'I Could Drink A Case Of You And I'd Still Be On My Feet'

The Gum Under The Seat Was Left With Just Enough Taste
Not To Be Wrapped In A Receipt But The Barman's Face
Shows He's Well Use To It, Flicking Matches Away
So The Bar Isn't Just Lit With That Trying Bouquet
Of Hairspray And Fake-tan From The Last Barstool

Who's Fun Just Began When The Kids Left Pre-school
'It's A Wonder' Laughs Jack 'She Don't Slip Down It'
His Teeth A Dirt Track From The Tobacco He Doesn't Spit
Then His Feet Fill His Shoes And Speaks So Its Taken Up Wrong
'Are You One Of Them Women Who's Not Real Without Makeup On?'
With Hands Cupping His Belt Buckle Till She Ceases Her Cough

She Loves Her Gin And Trouble And This Earns Him A Jerk-off
The Barman Has A Double Ready When She Returns Back
Her Ice Cracked And Sweaty Long Before Jack
Had Ever Tried His Hand For Here In Old Paul's
She Is Always In Demand But Only Before The School Bell Calls

CK